the really shitty thing about being told that youre smart your whole entire life is that as soon as you dont understand something you just kind of completely shut down and his this big shitty crisis because maybe youre not as smart as youve always been told
oh fuck this is totally me.
All through school the only reason people would want to work with me on projects was because i was the “smart kid”. Not only did it start this complex of feeling inadequate in all areas except for being “smart”, I was devastated when I wasn’t put into accelerated Math courses in high school. All my friends who were in accelerated English courses were also in accelerated Math courses and here I was, only good at English.
It fucking sucked and I was embarrassed for so long about how I wasn’t good enough to be in those same classes as my friends.